Mulled wine

December 12, 2010

December 9 – Party Prompt: Party. What social gathering rocked your socks off in 2010? Describe the people, music, food, drink, clothes, shenanigans. (Author: Shauna Reid)

Well, I’ve been to the grand total of ONE party this year! And I sort of co-organised it. I think it was an important kind of stepping stone in my life, because it was just after the whole friend-loss-betrayl-embarrassment thing. It proved to me that some people just do not care in the slightest about things that other people tell them, meaning to be spiteful. It showed me that not everybody is as bothered by the little, insignificant, brief things in life like I was and so many people I used to know were. So, thanks to you Oli, I’m a happier person because of the way you handled the little situation : )

So the party Kathy and I arranged was in April, and we set out for it to be a gathering in the local park with maybe a few bottles of various alcoholic drinks. Now, Kathy and I are not rebellious, party-all-night and get drunk every weekend kind of girls.

Of course, we knew it would never really end up like that. So in true all out party style we sent out a massage on Facebook.

Geo, Kathy and I went to Kathy’s house after college and set up a tent that we would be sleeping in later, with a couple of strictly invitees only. Then Oli, Shaun and his brother arrived and thus followed the most awkward two hours of my life. They laughed at the tent and set it up properly, then we clinked our way down to the park, where we sat on the grass and drank wine silently until more people arrived.

From then on, we all got a bit more chatty (no doubt from the wine and people we weren’t scared of talking to). Kathy and I went off and had a heart to heart, and I held Gareth’s hand and cried. I also glimpsed Jamie and considered going to talk to him, but decided against it. I was a coward.

December 10 – Wisdom Wisdom. What was the wisest decision you made this year, and how did it play out? (Author: Susannah Conway)

Without sounding too clever, I think I’ve made quite a few wise decisions this year. Undoubtably, the wisest was abandoning (or not begging them back) my ex-friends, who I realised made me have zero self-esteem, a very trumped up idea of my own importance, and a very nasty temper.

I think my second wisest decision was to try to make amends for the people I hurt in the days when the friends above most influenced me. So two out of three people have given me a third, fourth, fifth, millionth chance, and I thank them so much that they have.

December 11 – 11 Things What are 11 things your life doesn’t need in 2011? How will you go about eliminating them? How will getting rid of these 11 things change your life? (Author: Sam Davidson)

1. I don’t need all those pointless things I buy. I will ask myself three times whether I need it, how often will I use it, and whether I can make or find it cheaper somewhere else. This means I will have more money and less crap.

2. I don’t need to bite my nails. I will mentally tell myself that biting my nails is a disgusting habit and no-one will want to marry me if I have no nails. This will mean I can paint my nails more often, and also get married. Lol!

3. I don’t need to be as hypocritical as I am. Each time I find myself being hypocritical, I’ll remind myself that I do exactly the same thing. This will, I hope help me to be a better person.

4. I don’t need to start the diet tomorrow.

5. I don’t need to yell at Rowanna. She has ears, and I don’t plan to burst her eardrums for doing something as small as sitting on my bed.

6. I don’t need to make to-do lists. I just end up doing everything on there that is fun or not really to-do, like stitching, scrapbooking or baking. I ignore the things that I really do need to do, like writing that english coursework or drawing those pictures.

7. I don’t need to borrow money off people. If I see something I want, I’ll find it another time when I have money of my own.

8. I don’t need to make excuses. If I don’t want to do something, I’ll say, instead of just pissing off/letting people down.

9. I don’t need to get Rowanna/Mum/Friend to get things for me. I am perfectly capable.

10. I don’t need to upset people on purpose, by speaking my mind, or just being spiteful.

11. I don’t need to be afraid. I need to prove to myself that things can be resolved.

December 12 – Body Integration This year, when did you feel the most integrated with your body? Did you have a moment where there wasn’t mind and body, but simply a cohesive YOU, alive and present? (Author: Patrick Reynolds)

Wow, this is a tricky one. There’s never been a moment when I just hits me, but I suppose I have a few of these each weeks. Maybe that sounds a bit hopeful, I’m not sure. But I certainly have a sudden feeling that nothing physical matters, except my brain, and how I’m thinking. It’s tricky to explain. I feel so deeply rooted in the moment that everything else falls away.

Guess what I’m drinking at the moment :  )

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