Fresh

May 21, 2010

I’ve stopped waiting for an explanation, for an apology. I’ve stopped thinking, even subconsciously that I should apologise. I don’t want that. I’m onto something good and I’m happy with what’s happening now. Finally. I’m content, not nervy, or edgy, or detached anymore. I’ve found my place. And it’s comfortable here.

I’m happy for people, genuinely. I like the random heart-to-hearts, and the fact that we’re not all nervous or scared about talking. I’ve never been like or been around people who do that. Half the time now I don’t even realise that what my friend’s are saying is stuff that they haven’t really told anyone else before. My friends trust me. And it’s been a looong time since that happened.

I’ve been shopping this week too, and lots of stitching, and lots of drawing, and lots of watching the world go by. Sometimes we have to sit out just so we can get back in. I’ve even done some revising.

Tomorrow, it’s the yearly May Fair, then tomorrow evening Sarah is coming over to watch Dr Who, and it might be our last sleepover for a long time so I’ve got lots of stuff planned. Kinda sad, but also it’s going to be memorable, so yeah. Sunday is Nan’s house Day-painting, talking, spending time with family I didn’t really have much time for a couple of years ago. Then next week-first exam! Oh dear :/

Ah well, let’s be optimistic.

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