May 31, 2010

Well, tomorrow we are off to Ambleside to drop Sarah off and this is the last night I’ll be spending here in Sarah’s house for a couple of months. It’s kinda depressing, but kinda exciting too.

I’m crying.

No I’m not. Sarah just wanted me to write that. I won’t cry, I don’t cry in front of people. Perhaps tomorrow night at some unearthly hour when I get home.

I even made friendship bracelets 🙂 Sarah liked hers. She sewed a popper on and attempted to superglue stars on, but the glue lid didn’t come off. Haha.

Anyways, I’m off to help her pack and to get some sleep for our 4am wakeup call. I’ll post some photos on Wednesday of our excursion to the Lakes. I may even attempt to take some photos of Sarah, dangerous territory I know. xD


Sunday Afternoon

May 24, 2010

Well yesterday I prepared myself for the two following days (Tuesday espesh) to be trapped in the conservatory, frantically revising. So I went over my nan’s with Joseph and my grandad had bought my nan some Inktense pencils. I swooned, and immediately used them to draw a garden scene. Pure love.

Then I went and bought myself a cross stitching magazine since I’m officially OBSESSED now. Happily, it was a really good magazine with far too many charts for me to fall in love with.

Then we had a barbeque, and the cat-from-down-the-road turned up and sat on me, and consequently peed on my foot. Not appreciated.

But then mum told us we could get a kitten, which was very happily-received news.

And this morning when I woke up, the cat was literally sitting on my doorstep, meowing. So now I have a cat stalking me. Huzzah.

Saw Megan today, her life is currently like a romance novel. She’s fallen in love with a guy called Justin from Canada and she went to visit him, and they’re all cute and loved up. I spent pretty much all of the time saying ‘that’s adorable!’ I may have got a bit annoying after a while, but that’s the good thing about loved-up people-they don’t mind the cliches and annoying phrases and total lack of vocabulary.

So Wednesday is Kathkath’s date, my history exam, and Sarah’s leaving movie-night-type-gathering thing. Sad times. But hopefully Kathy’s date and my exam will go well, so we won’t all be too depressed.

Ahh-off to eat stir-fry and revise!

Nursery Rhymes

May 21, 2010

Elsie Marley has grown so fine

She won’t get up to feed the swine

But lays in bed til eight or nine

Lazy Elsie Marley!


I’ve changed my blog name to Til Eight or Nine, since I adore this nursery rhyme. I think my nanny used to sing it to me…

Nostalgia : )


May 21, 2010

I’ve stopped waiting for an explanation, for an apology. I’ve stopped thinking, even subconsciously that I should apologise. I don’t want that. I’m onto something good and I’m happy with what’s happening now. Finally. I’m content, not nervy, or edgy, or detached anymore. I’ve found my place. And it’s comfortable here.

I’m happy for people, genuinely. I like the random heart-to-hearts, and the fact that we’re not all nervous or scared about talking. I’ve never been like or been around people who do that. Half the time now I don’t even realise that what my friend’s are saying is stuff that they haven’t really told anyone else before. My friends trust me. And it’s been a looong time since that happened.

I’ve been shopping this week too, and lots of stitching, and lots of drawing, and lots of watching the world go by. Sometimes we have to sit out just so we can get back in. I’ve even done some revising.

Tomorrow, it’s the yearly May Fair, then tomorrow evening Sarah is coming over to watch Dr Who, and it might be our last sleepover for a long time so I’ve got lots of stuff planned. Kinda sad, but also it’s going to be memorable, so yeah. Sunday is Nan’s house Day-painting, talking, spending time with family I didn’t really have much time for a couple of years ago. Then next week-first exam! Oh dear :/

Ah well, let’s be optimistic.

Heart to Hearts

May 19, 2010

Went shopping today, and had a small heart-to-heart with Tamsin, had a heart-to-heart with Kathy on the way back to college, and Geo had a one-sided heart-to-heart with us all at lunch, while we listened. It’s a shame that my heart-to-hearts are spontaneous and very rare. So this is my heart-to-heart.

Tomorrow is my last day of AS subjects, and it’s kinda numb-scary. I’ve been at college for almost a whole year. Back in October someone told me to enjoy college because it goes quickly. Yeah, I didn’t realise it would go quite that  quickly. *Shock* I have study leave for the next few weeks, and exams and GCSE maths lessons in between. Sarah’s leaving on the 1st and I’m going up to Ambleside with her that day to say goodbye. She is my BOFF after all. At least I love the five hour car journey. And that coffee shop up there is damn good. And the fresh mountain air. And that art shop. And that quirky notepad shop. And the views.

But despite all the scenery and shopping prospects, I’m not going to be able to concentrate on that. I’ll be concentrating on not crying and trying to help her set up her room. And I’ll also be trying to figure out how long it will take me to save to go and see her again.

It’s just life happening. Life happens and you have to rock out to it. Life happens and shit happens and all you have to do is keep dancing right on through it, even though it stinks and the outlook is pretty icky, just keep on dancing.

And, failing dancing, nodding your head will suffice.



May 18, 2010


  1. All These Things I’ve Done-The Killers
  2. The Night Chicago Died-Paper Lace
  3. Breakeven-The Script
  4. Cha Cha Cha-The Little Ones
  5. Crocodile Shoes-Jimmy Nail
  6. Cry Me Out-Pixie Lott
  7. Dog Days Are Over-Florence and the Machine
  8. Dominos-The Big Pink
  9. Grace Kelly-Mika
  10. Hero-Regina Spektor
  11. Hollywood-Marina and the Diamonds
  12. Honest Man-Joey Ryan
  13. I’m A Believer-Smash Mouth
  14. Anything by Kenny Rogers
  15. I Don’t Love You-My Chemical Romance
  16. Iris-The Goo Goo Dolls
  17. Jumping All Over The World-Scooter
  18. Love Today-Mika
  19. Meet Me Halfway-The Black Eyed Peas
  20. Mushaboom-Feist
  21. My World-SR-71
  22. Naive-The Kooks
  23. Sunday Afternoon-The Kinks
  24. Pot Kettle Black-Tilly and the Wall
  25. Rain-Mika
  26. Rockin’ Robin-Bobby Day
  27. Shine-Laura Izibor
  28. Start Wearing Purple-Gogol Bordello
  29. Supermassive Black Hole-Muse
  30. Sweet About Me-Gabrielle Cilmi
  31. These Boots Are Made For Walking-Nancy Sinatra
  32. There Goes The Fear-Doves
  33. There Is a Light that Never Goes Out-The Smiths
  34. Anything by The Beautiful South
  35. Us-Regina Spektor
  36. Vagabond-Wolfmother
  37. Whistle for the Choir-The Fratellis
  38. Waking Life-Schuyler Fisk
  39. Yellow-Coldplay
  40. You Make My Dreams-Hall & Oates
  41. 1234-Feist
  42. 9 Crimes-Damien Rice

Start Wearing Purple

May 18, 2010

Start wearing purple wearing purple
Start wearing purple for me now
All your sanity and wits they will all vanish
I promise, it’s just a matter of time…

J’adore this song. My family are not impressed with me, or Gogol Bordello.


May 18, 2010

Supposed to be…

…making a birthday cake for my Uncle Craig, but my mum’s put the cake making book away and I can’t find it. 


…reading Pride and Prejudice. And revising.

…eating lunch. But there’s no food in our house until mum gets back from Newbury.

…tidying my room to do the said revision. Clear room, clear mind and all that shizz.

Doing instead…

…finding out the prices and trains to Windermere so I can be prepared to visit Sarah.

…listening to quirky music.

…deciding how long it will take me to save to buy Sarah’s leaving present.



May 15, 2010

On the 6th May, I posted a blog saying Happy Birthday to my Auntie Tracey.

25 years ago on the 15th May, my Auntie Tracey died.

I never knew her, none of her neices and nephews ever knew her, but now I’m drawn to her life, to her photographs, to her grave.

Twenty-five years later, she’s remembered by a generation she never saw born.


May 9, 2010


Please don’t accuse me of favouritism, but Down Syndrome children don’t often get as much love as they should.

Living in a small village has it’s advantages, one of these being that they all know Joseph and therefore adore him.

He was born on 2nd February 1998, and although everyone knew something was wrong at first, it took several weeks to work out he had Down’s.

He doesn’t have it mildly, or strongly, just enough for people to know there’s something not quite usual about him. He can’t speak, but he can do everything that the ‘stereotypical’ children can do; he runs, he plays football, he cooks and bakes, he draws, he writes, he types, he plays, he hugs, he gets dressed himself, he can make a sandwich himself, he can get a drink himself, he can jump on a trampoline, he can swim, he can ride, he can do everything except speak.

It makes me angry trying to explain to people. But sometimes it has to be done. People don’t understand.

In the Easter half term, I took Joseph and Rowanna to the park. When we were there, Joe was pretending to be a dog. He is a brilliant animal mimic, and he often does this. He was just playing.

But two little girls dressed in jeggings and low cut tops with fat bellies (and couldn’t have been older than about eight) came over and stared at him. They just stared. And whispered. And pointed. I was furious.

But because the common thought of the Teenager is that they will mug, rape, beat up, and consequently, murder anyone they even look at, I couldn’t exactly start having a go at these two girls since all the adults in the park would accuse me of trying to kidnap/abuse/etc those girls, I was powerless.

People don’t understand.

Joseph is my little brother, he’s a human, he doesn’t deserve to be stared at, or whispered about. It’s nobody’s fault the gene mutated. It’s not even about fault, it’s just that he doesn’t fit into today’s shitty conventional, stereotypical, robot society, and they isolate him and other’s for that. Well, fuck them.

Who wants a ‘normal’ child anyway?

Normal is boring. Normal means predictable conversation and insensitivity. Normal means looking like everyone else, there’s no variety. Normal is not being open to people, and understanding. Normal is people thinking they’re superior, and thinking they’re right all the time. Normal is not looking at something and seeing it as the most precious thing in the world.

Normal is two fat girls in a park staring at the most unique and wonderful thing ever; a child who has been denied the normality bestowed on the rest of us, and enjoying his life because he know’s it’s the best one.